Phil Doctrinaire has a huge following. His creed is that you have to believe every jot and title of it. Phil declares,” Modernity of course was wrong and we react against it by using their own modernist tools.” Phil was taken back by all this Post-Modern language which has no business with the Bible. Phil is highly upset because people are questioning his set of holy presuppositions as of yet and following this new upstart named Jesus.
Jesus is going around talking about the kingdom of God being among us.
Ha! Phil sneered saying that’s do-gooder liberalism and not biblical.
This Jesus is telling the crowds that Blessed are the poor..
That’s communism! And don’t get me started on those ungrateful illegal immigrants
Jesus is saying Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called the children of God.
You unpatriotic slime. Are you one of those Democrats? You Jesus are unamerican.
Jesus is saying Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you.
Are you out of your friggin mind? This is not a way to run a country that has God on it’s side.
Jesus is saying Do not Judge so that you may be judged.
Well God is the judge and you will be judge.
Jesus hangs out with sinners, prostitutes, tax-collectors even allowed one to wash his feet closely.
I knew he was immoral
Jesus said that those who do not give food to the hungry and thirsty, welcome strangers, clothe the naked, visit the sick and those in prisons will be punished.(Matt 25:31-6)
Phil Doctrinaire threw a big fit and ran off screaming “This Jesus is part of that heretical Emergent group!”
